|Those who get my weird... and are on my wavelength.|
I have been asked to stop claiming my social awkwardness. I have been told that I am not a misfit. I have been convinced into embracing this improved version of myself that has evolved into a social animal. After all, I can make people laugh and I have a supposedly charming smile!
This doesn't sit well with me. Not entirely. You see, now that I cannot blame it on inborn social awkwardness, what can I attribute some of my quirks to? I am a paradox socially. I can talk for hours but still remain withdrawn. I can love you deeply and not be there for you when you need it the most. I am a great texter (amazing content and good grammar) while managing to be a terrible communicator. I will braid you hair and share my food but will not take you shopping or be your 'wing woman'. I will vet your significant other and ask them all the hard questions but I will not be friends with them.
This paradox makes me a great friend. You will be lucky to have me in your life. We will have a lot of laughs and see the world from a cynical, funny perspective. It also makes me a lousy friend. I won't not only miss your birthday (and wedding) but I will not even know what date it is on!
I have tried to work on these flaws but have found that it simply doesn't work. The harder I try, the more tedious it gets. With time conversations get tedious. I hate it when that happens... when a great friendship gets exhausted and you can't hold a conversation without grunting from all the effort. I have resigned myself to the fact that I will be the friend who will always listen, even to your strangest BS; who will listen to and share great music with you; who will watch strange Indie films with you and dissect them afterwards; who will keep your mind off your problems by talking about her life incessantly; and who will brew you tea and make you an omelette whenever. You will, however, have to find a different friend for the hand holding; the back rubbing and the drunken brawls.
That said, I have a surprisingly quality portfolio of friends. The best collection of humans anywhere. Here's to them!